Ravaged Writer

Writing has always been my passion.  I love being able to connect with people through the gift of words.  However, the journey to becoming a published author is anything but easy.

Much like a college graduate, I entered the publishing arena wide-eyed and ready to put the work in to see my dreams come true.  Upon doing a Google search for publishing companies, I came across Trafford Publishing.  I quickly filled out their online form and submitted my collection of poetry for consideration.

Imagine my excitement when I received an e-mail from Trafford stating that my poetry was wonderful and exactly what they were looking for.  I was sent a contract to sign with the promise of grand things to come.

For some reason, $1,000 didn't seem like a large price to pay at the time.  My book was published and actually turned out well.  It can be found on Amazon.com, Barnes & Noble.com and is available on Kindle and Nook.  However, I was constantly hounded by foreign speaking employees trying to get me to spend thousands of dollars more on marketing packages.

Needless to say, I cut ties with them immediately.  Now, I am left with a box full of my books and the occasional $1.00 royalty check.

I have now written my first children's book entitled "Priceless Penny."  This tells the amazing adoption journey of my three-legged dog, Penny.


Once again, I took to Google to help me find the perfect publisher.  I soon discovered Tate Publishing.  My dreams of being a successful author were rekindled.  I could have my very own book trailer...if I was willing to spend the money.

I signed the contract with my head in the clouds, making my dreams appear closer than ever.  While I certainly thought that the $4,000 Tate was asking for was steep, the fact that they were so willing to create a payment plan option for me put my mind at ease.

Thankfully, I began reading some comments from my fellow authors and friends on Goodreads.  I soon found out that both Trafford and Tate Publishing are whats known as "vanity publishers."  Essentially, these are companies that will literally publish ANYTHING as long as they receive payment.  Luckily, I was only $150 in when I cancelled my contract with Tate.

Like any hopeful author, I began to tirelessly send out over 120 query letters.  Rejection after rejection came pouring in.  Until one day, I received a letter from Martin-McLean Literary Agency, LLC.  My manuscript had been accepted for representation!

I did research the company on Predators and Editors and found that most of the complaints dealt with the fact that the potential authors' manuscripts had not been accepted.  One author complained that the publishing company that the agency had secured a contract for him/her "wasn't big enough."

I honestly felt like the complaints had no merit.  With the contract signed, my faith in humanity was restored.  I did not mind paying $52 a month to have submission packets mailed to potential publishers.  Most recently, I received a letter from the agency informing me of the Book Expo America.

For $300, the literary agent would attend the conference and speak with at least 30 publishers.  Like Jillian Michaels says, "You need to take risks."  So, I sent in my confirmation letter.  But, something didn't feel right about it.  Why should I have to pay my agent to attend a conference that could possibly guarantee him/her a cut of my profits?

I decided to ask the Goodreads gurus.  They informed me that this is most certainly not the norm.  Once again, I had been duped.  I am greatly frustrated that such people/companies exist.  With all of the information on the Internet, how does one know who or what to believe? 

I have still not given up on my dream of becoming a successful author.  I am now a full fledged member of the SCBWI, which my Goodreads friends have assured me are legit.  Hopefully, fourth time's the charm.

Pitiful Parenting

One Friday night, my husband attempted to take me out to a peaceful dinner.  We had both been having a terrible week and I was looking forward to relaxing together.  My stomach growled as we pulled into the Arby’s parking lot.

We found a cozy both near the center of the restaurant.  As we waited for our food, we began to have a discussion about our jobs.  Suddenly, a little boy screamed, “DADDY!”  I turned around to look.  Sure enough, there were two young boys ( I would say ages 6 and 8) sitting with their father.  He was apparently oblivious to his son’s shouting.  Matt smiled at me and resumed the conversation.

Once again, the boy began to yell for his “daddy” and then whine when his other brother received the attention he was so desperately seeking.  I kept turning around and giving the older boy “the look.”  I had hoped that he would nudge his brother and get him to quiet down since his dad didn’t seem to care that his child was disturbing other patrons.  Of course, the boy couldn’t care less.  They continued to hoot and holler.

What happened next absolutely enraged me.  The screamer (as I have dubbed him), yelled “Daddy, what are they going to do with that thing they’re taking out of my neck?”  Seriously?  I suppose the dad was trying to ignore his son’s inappropriate question, however, this made the boy shout it two more times.  He then followed up his performance with, “When are they taking it out?  Will I be able to see it?  How are they going to take it out?”

I almost jumped out of my seat and reprimanded the boy myself.  Who teaches their child to behave this way?  Why would you ever just sit in silence while your child screams and proceeds to discuss medical procedures in a restaurant?  If I would have acted like that when I was little, my mom would have immediately whisked me out of the restaurant, given me a spanking in the parking lot and taken me straight home where I would receive another spanking and be sent to my room.  The dad and his sons FINALLY left, laughing and smiling.

Unless a child has a mental or behavioral disorder, how he/she acts is a direct reflection of his/her parents.  And when parents allow unacceptable behavior to go unpunished, they are simply creating a monster that everyone will have to deal with.

Not long after they left, a woman came in with her daughter (she looked to be about 5 years old).  The mother placed their order and then sat down in the booth next to ours.  She quietly instructed her daughter to remain seated while she went up to get their drinks, napkins, etc.  The little girl sat quietly in her seat while peeking over the divider at us.

When the mom returned with the food, she began talking with her daughter about their summer plans.  The girl conversed with her in an “inside” voice and never shouted.  In fact, I could barely even hear her.  She was a perfect little angel and ate her food without any fuss (even though she thought the Arby’s sauce looked suspicious).

When Matt and I finished eating, I saw the mom at the condiment counter.  I complimented her daughter’s wonderful behavior and the mother’s fantastic parenting skills.  While I felt awkward for doing so, the mother seemed quite flattered.  She didn’t realize how much her daughter’s peaceful demeanor had changed the tone of our tense evening.

The parenting skills between this mother and the a fore mentioned father are like night and day.  The boys kept fighting for their father’s attention by screaming and he did nothing about it.  But, this little girl followed her mother’s instructions to the letter and still exhibited a delightful personality.  Please understand that I do not want any child to behave like a robot.  I am simply saying that parents need to take their role seriously and expect their children to behave and follow their rules.

I have also come to find that children are also the product of their environment (i.e. how they are raised).  I will be honest, not everyone is cut out to be a parent.  Such as the people in this next scenario.

On Saturday morning, one of my friends posted a harrowing story on Facebook.  She had gone to the local Shop n’ Save to complete her weekend grocery shopping.  When she got out of her car, she noticed a baby locked all alone in the vehicle next to hers.  Aside from being this being a bad idea in general, it was also very hot outside, in the upper 80’s.

Outraged, she marched straight up to the customer service desk and began to explain the situation.  Little did she know that the baby’s parents were behind her.  They began to scream at her to “mind her own f-ing business.”  Which they followed up with “We were only going to be gone a minute.”  And guess what was so important that they both had to leave their baby for?  Alcohol.  Yep, they were buying beer.

I was so proud of my friend for standing up to the so-called “parents.”  She yelled right back that one of them needed to stay in the vehicle with the baby.  She also informed them that it is too hot for the child to be locked up like that.

I shudder to think that things like this actually happen.  What would possess you to leave anything alive locked up in a hot vehicle?  Don’t even get me started on people that do this to pets!  And aren’t people worried about their child being abducted by some creep?  I never let my dogs out of my sight even when they are in our fenced in yard.  How could you just think that leaving your baby alone is a good idea? 

My fears are further confirmed by another story that appeared on a local news channel.  A woman was getting married and she wanted to include her baby in the big day.  So, she tied the baby to the train of her gown and the baby was drug behind her all the way down the aisle. 

I seriously wish that DCFS would swoop in and take these children away from these careless human beings.  And if women find themselves “unexpectedly” pregnant and feel that the baby will “cramp their style,” I pray that they will make the wise decision and place the baby up for adoption.  A friend of the family adopted her second son from such a situation.  That little boy is getting more love than he knows what to do with.  He is leading a much better life that he ever would have with his teen “parents.”

I realize that raising a human child is hard, however, it can be done.  My parents both worked full time jobs and still managed to teach me right from wrong and shower me with love and affection.  Matt’s mother even took on the role of teacher by homeschooling both him and his sister.

As a society, we need to stand together and speak up when we see parents neglecting or creating harmful situations for their children.  Remaining silent only perpetuates the endangerment that plagues too many of America's children.