Grass Gripe

I received a very shocking phone call today from my husband.  One of the our city’s administrators called and informed him that he needs to mow the grass in our backyard.  How did this administrator know that we needed to mow?  A lady called in to complain!

 

Needless to say, I was speechless.  My first thought is, how did this “lady” see our BACK YARD?  We live along a street with our front house literally on the city sidewalk.  There is no front lawn, only the backyard, which cannot be seen from the front of the house.  In fact, the only way to see the backyard is walk around the side of our house or drive down the alley behind our house.

 

How can our grass offend someone?  It is OUR grass in OUR yard.  Unless this person would like to contribute to our monthly mortgage payment or property tax, I think she should mind her own business.  And who has time to go around inspecting people’s yards, anyway?

 

RETIRED PEOPLE!  Yes, we are surrounded by retired people.  While I have nothing against those who have put in their time as a productive member of society, I find that once these people retire, they become bored.  Suddenly, they have nothing better to do than pick on their fellow neighbors.  I can think of tons of things that I would do if I could retire right now:  travel, write, read, play video games, snuggle with my fur babies, etc.  I would NOT go around town trying to make trouble.

 

My husband and I have nothing against cutting our grass.  However, we do have a problem with someone else TELLING us when we need to mow our grass.  Matt and I both work full time.  He typically does not get home until 8:30 or 9:00 p.m.  I really doubt that this lady would want him to fire up the lawn mower at that time of night. 

 

Secondly, I was raised that women do not mow.  My mom was always told that she would probably chop her foot off, so I was never taught how to mow.  And Matt so graciously agrees with this upbringing.  I take care of the inside of the house and he takes care of the outside.  

 

Thirdly, it has been ridiculously hot outside.  The temperature has been in the upper 90’s all week.  According to my car’s temperature sensor, it felt like 108 degrees yesterday.  How does this lady expect us to mow in this extreme heat?

 

Finally, Matt has asthma.  The biggest thing that affects him?  Temperature.  If he gets too cold or too hot, he has to take his inhaler, often multiple times.  If that is not successful, he has to use his portable nebulizer.  And if that doesn’t do the trick, we have to head to the ER.  There is no way that I am going to jeopardize his health over something as silly as grass.

 

I really wish that people would just mind their own business.  Case in point, we have a woman that lives down the street from us.  She owns the yappiest dog in the world.  Seriously, you can hear this dog barking at all hours of the day.  But, I would never dream of calling the police for a "noise disturbance."  All dogs are different and bark for varying reasons.  And I know how difficult it can be to quiet a dog that is already riled up.

What upsets me the most is that this person didn't even try to politely ask us to mow our grass.  Instead, she went behind our backs and called a town administrator, making us sound like we are a pair of ruthless criminals.

I hope that this person realizes how lucky she is to have us as neighbors.  Matt and I don't drink or smoke.  We never have any wild and crazy parties.  We don't have any "domestic disturbances."  In fact, we pretty much keep to ourselves.

Why our grass offended this woman, I do not know.  I am even more surprised that our house didn't upset her.  It's pink.

Drama Divas

I am about to share a very personal story with you. This is something that I rarely talk about due to its upsetting nature. However, after what transpired yesterday, I feel compelled to blog about my experience.

Yesterday was the anniversary of the death of one of my friends. We will call him *Jimmy. In 1999, Jimmy took his own life because he was being bullied at school. No one knew that he was being stuffed into lockers daily. He was such a quiet person that he rarely shared his feelings with anyone.

As I was scrolling through my Facebook feed last night, I saw a very interesting post from one of my “friends.” *Jessica had posted a picture of Jimmy on her wall along with the following:

“I love you, Jimmy and you will be in my heart always.”

I was enraged upon reading this post. Allow me to explain why. Jimmy and I became boyfriend/girlfriend at the end of our 8^th grade year. We “dated” that summer (although we never actually went to each other’s house). We would talk on the phone for hours, say “I love you” and hang up. Hey, we were new to the dating scene.

Before beginning our freshman year at high school, we “broke up” via e-mail. We still remained close friends and even had a class together. I then began dating my first “real” boyfriend, *Mike.

I found out about Jimmy’s death at school that day. It was like everything was moving in slow motion. I kept thinking it was some horrible nightmare that I would eventually awaken from. But, it was very real.

My fellow students kept coming up and asking me if I was okay since they knew we had “dated.” To be honest, I just felt numb. I wanted to go home and cry and throw things around.

I spoke very briefly with the school counselor. I was raised to be a strong person, so I mumbled that I was fine because I really didn’t know how I felt (or what I was feeling, for that matter). The topic of suicide never came up at home or in any discussions with my friends. It was only discussed briefly in health class along with the lesson on depression.

Getting back to Jessica’s post, when Mike and I left school early the following day to attend Jimmy’s funeral, she was nowhere to be found. When I attended the wake and was sobbing uncontrollably after Jimmy’s cousin (who was also in the same year in school) told me how much Jimmy cared about me and that I had made him happy, Jessica was not there.

Jessica and I had been best friends in grade school, but when I began to gain more friends (and the attention of boys) in high school, things began to fizzle. She became a major drama queen and even threatened to kill herself because I ended up dating a boy that she had been obsessed with. My mom had to call her and tell her to quit with the nonsense because I came home from school in hysterics fearing that I would see the death of another person I cared about.

Jimmy’s passing has left numerous scars on my heart and mind. I still suffer from flashbacks, nightmares and anxiety attacks when someone even mentions the word “suicide.” But, Jessica, who barely even knew him, feigns as if she lost her BFF.

So, now here she is, 15 years later acting as if she and Jimmy were inseparable. They only hung out once: at my birthday party. She never talked to him at school, but yet, he “will always be in her heart.” And she is claiming to be a supporter of suicide prevention, but she would ALWAYS threaten to do herself in if she didn’t get her way. Talk about a hypocrite!

I truly cannot understand people who join in on a tragedy simply to get attention. I find that most of these people tend to be girls, so I call them Drama Divas. They are addicted to anything dramatic and love to start rallies, post, tweet and be at the forefront so that they will be noticed. Personally, I think that this behavior is shameful. Why pretend that someone’s death affects you when it does not?

Case in point, there was a girl, *Emily, that I went to school with. We were even in the same Girl Scout troop. She was killed in a car accident in 2004. I did not attend the wake nor was I present at the funeral. When people post touching memorials on Facebook on the anniversary of her death, I do not enter a tearful tribute. Why? Because Emily and I were not friends. In fact, she tormented me at every single Girl Scout meeting. I certainly did not wish Emily any ill will, however, since she had never been a part of my world, why would I pretend that her death greatly affected me and my life?

Please understand that I was upset to learn of her passing. I want everyone to be able to live a long and happy life, no matter what path they choose. But to act as if I thought about Emily every day thereafter or that her departure from this world changed my life would be a cruel lie. And to try to seek attention from her death would be absolutely despicable.

I believe that there is a fine line between showing your support for someone and attempting to steal the spotlight, so to speak. I also find it exceedingly disrespectful to the family of the deceased loved one. There is nothing worse than having to deal with a fake person while you are in the midst of a personal tragedy.

While I have not un-friended Jessica, I find that I am greatly disappointed in her. It appears that she is still up to her old tricks and tactics to get people to notice her. In the end, I simply feel sorry for her that she feels she must use the tragedies of others to make herself feel happy.

*Names have been changed

Heartless Heathens

When Adriel passed the test to become a certified therapy dog with Therapy Dogs International, Matt and I were thrilled. We could not wait to share our little treasure with those who are really in need of a smile.

In the past three years, we have gone to so many different places and have met many wonderful people. My personal favorites are the local Kids’ Club and a center for Autistic boys. Their faces lit up when Adriel pranced into the room.

Unfortunately, while visiting a care center, I contracted C. Diff. This is probably the nastiest bug that I have EVER contracted. The C. Diff virus messes up the natural balance of bacteria in your colon. For me, this meant many frequent trips to the restroom coupled with extreme gas. Not the kind that you can smell, but the kind that you can hear rumbling around in your belly from across the room.

The first week that I was on medication to clear up the C. Diff was great. I was finally starting to feel like myself again. But the second week, I just wanted to die. Literally. I had to miss an entire week of work because not only was I running to the restroom, I also felt like I was going to throw up 24/7.

I spent the entire week sleeping and trying to eat. I would definitely say that this was the worst week of my entire life. Once the medication was done and over with, things seemed to go back to normal.

However, as my life became more stressful, the issue cropped back up. I was terrified that the C. Diff had returned. I deposited several stool samples at my doctor’s office to be tested. Each one came back negative. Whew!

So, if I didn’t have C. Diff again, what was the problem? My doctor did his best to cure me. He prescribed this disgusting orange powder to drink. It didn’t help. Finally, after dealing with this issue for 6 months, I was sent to a G.I. specialist.

A colonoscopy was soon scheduled. I must say, the prep work was the worst part. The actual procedure itself was a piece of cake. The doctor and his staff were fantastic. I waited patiently for the results. Then I got the call: normal!

To be completely sure, I had to have a second procedure done. This one involved swallowing a camera and being hooked up to a monitor that recorded the pictures that the camera took. Not painful at all. A bit weird, but no pain.

Yesterday, I received the call: normal again! While I am relieved to know that there is nothing serious going on, I am still having colon issues. So, the nurse scheduled me for another consultation next Friday, August 29^th. 

This is the busiest time of year at my job. So busy that we are not allowed to take time off during the entire month of August. I never thought of this as a big deal since I hardly ever take time off to do something fun. It is almost always a doctor’s appointment or a car repair.

I have always prided myself on making my appointments for the absolute latest time during the day. This way, I can save what little sick/vacation/personal time that I have. I also feel that this is the most respectful thing to do in regards to my employer.

The time off request slip was placed in my inbox. While the time was approved, the following note was written on the bottom of the slip:

“Lauren, please try not to schedule appointments for the month of August as we are not to approve any time off requests.”

I was shocked. Stunned. Livid! I was not asking to take the whole day off. I was asking for one measly hour. My appointment is at 3:30 p.m. I wanted to leave at 3:00 p.m. (and I work from 8:00 a.m. to 4:00 p.m.). I could not believe that I was being chastised for trying to take care of my health.

Not to mention that next Friday is August 29^th, the LAST DAY of August. Our crazy-busy time has already come and gone, and they know that. What was I supposed to tell the doctor and nurses who are trying to make me feel better? “I’m sorry. While I am still having horrible colon issues, I regret to inform you that my bosses do not care about my health and I will have to reschedule my appointment for some time in September.”

Needless to say, my work moral is officially shot. While I will continue to work with the same professional attitude and efficiency I always have, in my mind, I will simply be coming for the paycheck. I have lost all respect for my bosses. Knowing that they simply do not care about my health and well-being is crippling and I will never view them the same way again.

I do not understand why many jobs are treating their employees this way. My husband’s job expects the employees to be superhuman and to never get sick. While they accrue sick time, they are often penalized by their supervisor for using it. How can you perform at your best when you are not in good health? Not to mention that I have personally experienced getting sick from fellow co-workers who knew that they were too sick to come to work, but literally had no choice. Do the bosses not understand that allowing one sick employee to come to work has the potential to make ALL of their employees sick?

Additionally, more and more jobs seem to seek total control of their employee’s lives They do not care that their employees have lives outside of work. These people have families, pets, and hobbies. How can there be a balance between work and home when jobs are becoming so demanding?

Case in point, we were all required to work two 12 hour shifts and one weekend shift for the past two weeks. I worked my weekend shift and turned right around and worked my second 12 hour shift that following Monday. I did not really get a weekend. I had no time to catch up on sleep or relax. And I have felt exhausted for the remainder of the week.

Why does it have to be this way?  Instead of being rewarded for our hard work and dedication, we are punished for being human and getting sick or for wanting to spend time with our spouses/family/friends.  I truly wish that there was something that could be done, however, at this point, we all feel stuck.  While we are somewhat lucky to have the jobs that we do, it is hard to work for an employer that you know does not care about you and does not view you as a fellow human being.